Spiraling Downward

“The Man” began to act in very non-“Man” like ways. First he would reschedule any activity that included Jona, putting it off again and again, leaving me to handle Jona’s disappointment.

And we’d talk about it and he’d apologize and share the struggles he was having and tell me he loved me and he loved Jona and I’d quietly suggest that he might want to find a good therapist.

And after we talked, things would improve … for a while.

Then “The Man” began to show up late for our dates or not bother showing up at all – and getting terribly bent out of shape when this bothered me. I moved from quietly suggesting to stating flat out that he needed to find a good therapist.

And we’d talk about how he was feeling and how I was feeling and he’d share with me what he was going thru and never failed to tell me how much he loved me and I could see that guilt was clearly eating him alive and we’d hold each other and talk about how important we are to each other.

And after we talked, things would improve … for a while.

Soon we weren’t really going out at all, just hanging around my place or his, and talking – and I began to feel more like his damn therapist than anything else. No, wait – all of his anger was directed at me, too. I didn’t just feel like his therapist – I felt like his “whipping boy”. All of a sudden there was nothing I could say or do that was right, and he was sliding downhill fast – looked (and acted) like a walking shadow of his former self.

And I was practically screaming that he NEEDED to get into THERAPY … NOW!

And he did.