Normal

My Mom mentioned normal in her post yesterday. What is normal?
When you’ve lost a parent, there is no normal anymore.

It is not normal to miss a week of kindergarten because your Dad died.

It is not normal to not be allowed to join Tiger Scouts because your Dad is gone and your Mom has to work all the time just to pay the bills.

It is not normal to have your Mom “be your Dad” at all the Father-Son events (but thanks Mom, ‘cause I’d rather go with you than miss out! You’re an ok Dad!)

It is not normal to be the only one on the soccer team without a Dad at the awards ceremony.

It is not normal to have only a Mom at parent teacher conferences.

It is not normal to have your Mom cross you over from Cub Scouts to Boy Scouts when every other boy has his Dad there.

It is not normal to see your Mom sitting alone at band concerts when everyone else looks like they are sitting with family.

It is not normal to not have Dad around to talk to.

It is not normal to not have Dad at your swim meets.

It is not normal to know that parts of your Dad’s body are alive and helping someone else. (But it is kind of cool!)

My Mom could probably make this list a lot longer. I could too, but you already see what I’m saying. Normal doesn’t exist anymore. Not for me. Normal disappeared a long time ago. People don’t realize this. They just assume that your life is like their life. But it’s not. And it never will be.


*Mom's note: While Jona is correct (normal is gone) it is also correct to say that families rebuild a "new normal". What is normal in our home now is certainly different than it used to be, but we do have our own "new normal" - it's just not what most people think of when they think of normal!