Thoughts on Mother's Day

When I look across the dinner table at Jona, I know how lucky I am. But I also see the void; the empty seat that should be occupied by Chloe Ray, an irreplaceable, beautiful little girl who was so peaceful and so perfect, but too tiny to survive. I have made my peace with this loss, but don’t think that all my tears have been wiped away.

How do I cope? One breath, one tear, one moment at a time. So many people are afraid to speak of death and dying. They think that not speaking of it makes it somehow easier, as if it can perhaps slip by unnoticed. They are mistaken. We notice the void everywhere; from the empty spot in the church pew, to telling a new friend how many children we have, to the photograph on the wall that will never age.

With Mother’s Day approaching, please remember the mothers who have broken hearts and empty arms, the mothers who are aching for the child they should be holding. Remember other mothers like me who on this Mother’s Day feel the void, the absence. True, we may have other children begging our attention, but we remember and we have a heartbreaking ache for the child that cannot be replaced. Mother’s Day after the death of a child is particularly hard and is not a “happy” Mother’s Day.

This Mother’s Day, remember a mom who is hurting.